Chapter 3
HEALTH CARE 101
044
24. HOW DO I FIND A GOOD VETERINARIAN?
Time was when a dog would have a vet for life, a family practitioner for the furry. Veterinary monogamy is no longer a given. Specialization and the explosion of the industry have made pet care very competitive. So take your time, and don’t worry if you don’t find “the one” right away.
Among the many reasons to get a dog from a shelter20 or a reputable breeder is that they’ve vetted many vets and have a good basis for recommendations. Ask dog-connected friends, relatives, and co-workers for referrals, too. Groomers, trainers, and pet boutique proprietors may offer leads, but beware canine cronyism (“I carry your brochure and you carry mine”).
Some objective criteria to consider include affiliation with the American Animal Hospital Association (AAHA; www.healthypet.com), which ensures that a facility offers a wide array of equipment and services. It doesn’t, however, allow you to evaluate the skill—or the warmth—of each participating doctor. Similarly, membership in a state veterinary association (click on the state resources section of the American Veterinary Medical Association website, www.avma.org) suggests a practitioner’s interest in continuing education and animal welfare issues, but not necessarily her ability to relate to patients.
In any case, you’re the only one who can judge what’s most important to you, including convenience, cost, and approach (for example, openness to alternative medicine). You may not even be aware of your priorities until you visit a vet a few times.
Consider these basics when choosing a practice.
APPEARANCE
Of the offices, not of the participating vets (although hot-ness is a bonus in any professional you’re likely to be seeing on a regular basis). The waiting room should be clean but not sterile, with comfortable chairs and a good use of space, including enough room to keep the nervous dogs from being intimidated by the bullies. The back areas where overnight patients stay and lab work is conducted should be spotless—ditto the vet techs—and the cages should be spacious. And yes, any reputable vet should allow you to tour this back area on the spur of the moment, i.e., without having to yell, “Heads up, pet owner incoming.”
BASIC EQUIPMENT
Again, of the office, not the vets. Things such as onsite x-ray equipment, laboratory, and pharmacy mean your dog can get diagnosed and treated expeditiously, and you don’t have to run around or phone a lot of different facilities.
NUMBER AND QUALITY OF PARTICIPATING VETS
If you have an emergency and your “primary” isn’t available, it’s comforting to know that other trustworthy docs have immediate access to your dog’s records. You don’t have to like the other vets as much as you do your own, but it’s desirable for you to consider them competent. Ideally, a practice should be diverse, including a fresh-out-of-school newbie versed in the latest equipment and techniques as well as a senior person with lots of surgical experience. If there’s a clinic in your city affiliated with a university department of veterinary science or college of veterinary medicine, you’ve hit the jackpot.
COST
The fees for basic procedures such as exams and vaccinations should be in the same ballpark as those of other vets in your town; phone around and ask. Don’t consider a practice that makes you feel guilty or cheap for inquiring; it’ll only get worse down the road if you’re faced with deciding whether you can afford an expensive life-saving procedure (but see question 28). Nix any vet who tries to minimize your financial concerns.
Be suspicious of cutesy names like Paws or The Pet Center. They tend to signify either superficial glitz—soft music, Earth tones, the latest issues of Dog Fancy instead of three-year-old copies of the Economist, all which will cost you—or bare bones facilities that need a gimmick to draw patients in.
STAFF
Quantity—enough people in the office to ensure efficiency in a large practice—and quality are both important. Staff members should be able to answer basic questions about medical procedures as well as about payment plans, and they should be welcoming to canine patients, no matter how smelly and drooly. If your dog isn’t as cute as, say, my Frankie, the receptionist should at least comment on her sweetness, perhaps, or his friendliness. Note: The flattery requirement is waived for dogs who make the staff cower behind their desks.
Things to look for in a vet include the following traits.
ACCREDITATION
While your dog is being weighed, take a peek at the diploma on the wall. You want someone with at least a DVM (Doctor of Veterinary Medicine) or equivalent degree (for example, a BVMS or Bachelor of Veterinary Medicine and Surgery, offered in the United Kingdom), preferably from a country you’ve heard of where they don’t eat small domestic animals.
DOGSIDE MANNER
Not all vets are equally kind to their pet patients; I’ve encountered some who are downright brusque. No pup likes to be probed and prodded but the best vets are skilled in minimizing doggie discomfort with gentle handling, soothing tones—and a well-paced plying of treats. (People doctors should consider adopting this last technique; I’d bet a few Godiva chocolates would go a long way toward mitigating the stress of a gynecological exam.)
PEOPLE SKILLS
Sure, the vet’s attitude toward your dog is foremost, but you need to be able to provide follow-up care, so instructions need to be clear. And there’s no excuse for a vet to be patronizing; remember, a good part of her day is spent inserting thermometers into small animal butts. Finally, as with the members of his staff, a vet should say flattering things about your dog—or at least should avoid insults. One vet told me that Frankie was “weird” and a “bad patient” because he wouldn’t pee for the techs who walked him during an all-day diagnostic stay. Frankie is an extremely skilled urinater when he so desires, thank you very much, but he’s not a pee-on-demand pup.
25. HOW SOON DO I NEED TO BRING MY DOG TO THE VET?
Very soon. If you get a dog who hasn’t had a verified health exam or thorough temperament evaluation, don’t even take her home; head straight for the vet. Sad but true: If something is seriously wrong you need to know before you bond with the pup and spend vast quantities of money and emotional energy on her.
If you get a dog with a clean preliminary bill of health, see the vet within the first few weeks of her homecoming. Puppies need a series of vaccinations (see question 30) and healthy older dogs need a “wellness” exam to serve as a baseline for future diagnoses. You’ll also want to get some guidelines for what’s normal—in addition to those sketched in question 33 —as soon as possible.
26. HOW CAN I MAKE THE MOST OUT OF A VET VISIT?
By observing a few basic rules of vet-iquette.
GET A NEW ATTITUDE
Avoid sending stress signals to your dog about an upcoming visit. Puppies don’t have any negative preconceptions about doctors, and an adult dog who’s new to you might pick up on your positive cues. Try pretending that you’re going to a sedate dog park where pups and their people get to spend some quiet quality time together.
BE NICE TO THE SUPPORT STAFF
They’re the ones who put you on hold—or not—when you phone, put the messages on the vet’s desk—or not—and generally oil the office wheels. Just as staff members need to say nice things about your dog, you in turn are well advised to compliment staff hairstyles, jewelry, virility—whatever works.
BE ON YOUR BEST BEHAVIOR
By which I mean, make sure your dog is on his. He may not be fully trained yet but, in the case of a large dog, work on “sit” and “down” commands before you come in, the better to avoid disturbing other patients and their accompanying people. Small pups should be kept in your lap if they’re excitable; it’s also a good way to keep them from picking up germs from the floor.
BRING ALONG A LIST OF QUESTIONS
Especially early on, you’ll have plenty of things to ask about what to expect. Try to remember to commit these questions to paper—and to take the paper along with you.
TELL THE TRUTH, NO MATTER HOW EMBARRASSING
If you bring your dog in with stomach distress, don’t pretend you didn’t see him scarfing down the discarded condoms near your bed. You don’t have to say what you were doing—or with whom—while those condoms were being consumed, or even what size they were. Sure, your vet might laugh about it at the bar with his friends later but at least your dog will get the correct treatment.
EXPRESS YOURSELF
Although it’s the vet’s responsibility to try to be clear, she’s not a mind reader, so follow up on anything you don’t understand. And voice your concerns, no matter how peculiar (poop eating) or petty (nail clipping) they may seem. As it happens, feces feasting is not all that uncommon, and clipping a dog’s nails may help prevent painful infections.
DON’T SECOND-GUESS YOUR VET
Reading up on medical issues on the Internet or elsewhere has its limits. It’s good to be an informed consumer, the better to ask educated questions, but not useful to argue when your vet expresses an opinion that’s based on education and experience—and thus a far greater ability to interpret data. And remember that your vet is looking at your actual dog, not a theoretical on-line case. If you have serious doubts about a diagnosis, it’s fine to inquire how the vet arrived at it or ask for clarification. Just don’t start your sentence with, “But I read on the Internet …” It’s perfectly fine, on the other hand, to ask your vet if she can recommend some helpful websites.
TAKE NOTES—AND MAKE A PLAN
Dogs are notoriously bad at remembering details and even worse at writing things down; you’ll be expected to do both if you want to remember what was said during the exam. Perhaps one of the most important things to jot down is the blueprint for what comes next: “So we come back in six months for a follow-up exam?” Or, “I’ll make an appointment for a teeth cleaning as soon as that gum infection is cleared up?”
27. SHOULD I GET HEALTH INSURANCE FOR MY DOG?
Hell, yes—and the sooner the better. The younger and the healthier your dog, the more insurable she will be and the lower the premiums you’ll pay. Pet insurance isn’t yet as popular as it’s bound to become, which is why it didn’t occur to me to get it. Now I kick myself for not having thought to insure Frankie, who, without any predictors, developed diabetes. This chronic, preexisting condition pretty much eliminates my sugar-sweet pup from the pool of insurable pooches. And I can’t even claim him as a dependent on my tax returns.
Yes, insurance is an additional monthly expense, but it’s an anticipated one that you can budget for. Premiums are fairly reasonable and not having to factor in cost when facing the decision of whether to provide treatment—priceless. Why join the ranks of the estimated 73 percent of people willing to go into debt for their pets?
Another reason to get in on pet insurance now: because it’s set up so that you pay for treatment up front and fill out the forms for reimbursement, vets don’t have to deal with a bureaucracy. And pet insurance companies don’t dictate conventional treatment choices—yet.
That’s not to say you don’t have to do research to get the best deal. Things to consider for comprehensive insurance plans—which are different from discount plans where you pay an annual fee in return for lower prices on vet services—are similar to what you’d look for in human plans. Just be sure to read the fine print. In some cases, for example, claims have to be submitted within 60 days to be accepted.
Take the following items into account when deciding on pet health insurance.
CHOICE OF VETERINARIAN
Most plans let you see anyone you like; others are similar to HMOs, limiting you to certain health-care providers.
WAITING PERIOD
There’s usually at least a 10-day wait so that people don’t sign up immediately after their dog leaps off a precipice. Check and see when a policy will take effect—and watch your pup like a hawk until then.
RATE GUARANTEE
Some companies adjust their premiums on a quarterly basis; that means if they pay a claim they can raise your rates in the next period. Make sure the company you choose offers contracts for at least one year, with no fee-rise adjustments if you submit a claim.
RENEWABILITY
You want a plan that doesn’t consider a condition diagnosed after you first contracted with the company as preexisting, and thus as a reason for not renewing your insurance.
EXCLUSIONS
Typically, dogs younger than six to eight weeks and those older than eight to ten years are ineligible for insurance. Those with preexisting conditions and breed-specific hereditary conditions are generally excluded, too, though in some cases you can pay extra for coverage. Another reason to get a mutt: they’re more easily insured.
WELLNESS
Things like dental care, vaccinations, and heartworm testing should be covered. Some plans don’t take care of neutering or spaying, but that shouldn’t be a deal breaker as clinics often offer deep discounts for those procedures.
PRESCRIPTIONS
You often end up spending far more money on medicines than on office visits and services, so be sure your plan offers good coverage.
DEDUCTIBLES
As with human plans, the higher the deductible, the lower your premium.
SPECIFICITY
You’ll find plans that say they reimburse you for “reasonable and customary fees.” That’s way too much wiggle room. You’re far better off with an insurer that provides a chart detailing what you can expect to get back for what you pay out.
CAPS
There’s usually an annual limit for what a company will reimburse. Find out if there’s also a limit to what insurance will pay for a specific incident.
Although you still have fewer choices for pet insurance than for auto or homeowners’ insurance, more and more companies are entering the field every month. Those with proven track records include Veterinary Pet Insurance (www.petinsurance.com ) and PetCare (www.petcareinsurance.com). Both the ASPCA (www.aspcapetinsurance.com) and the AKC (www.akcphp.com/BHIACMS/) have recently introduced policies, and the Humane Society features discounts on PetPlan (www.gopetplan.com). Check www.PetInsuranceReview.comto get real people feedback on some of the most widely used plans.
28. IS THERE SUCH A THING AS ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE FOR DOGS?
Naturally. The American Holistic Veterinary Medical Association (ahvma.org; log on to find practitioners in your area) dates back to 1982, and the popularity of its doggie “modalities,” including acupuncture, homeopathy, herbal medicine, and chiropractic, parallels that of its human counterparts. The monthly Whole Dog Journal (www.whole-dog-journal.com) details the latest in natural dog care, while Natural Remedies Dogs and Cats Wish You Knew by Viv Harris outlines treatments for problems ranging from allergies to cancer.
I’m no slave to conventional medicine but my forays into the alternative arena haven’t been terribly successful. Most recently, the search for a nutritionist to help with Frankie’s diabetes led us to Dr. B., who determined that Frankie’s neutering scar was blocking the blood flow to his pancreas. Her suggested remedy: rub flaxseed oil into the area. Initially blissed out by these ministrations—his testicles might be MIA, but his penis hasn’t left the neighborhood—Frankie soon began to squirm away in shame. I immediately ceased treatment. Nevertheless, on our next visit Dr. B. judged the blockage cleared and praised my persistence. I went back to my traditional vet, and Frankie and I resumed our previous, more decorous relationship.
So do what you think works for you and your dog—but not on your own. Take the “complementary” and “integrative” claims of alternative practices seriously: make sure they complement and integrate with the advice of a person who has completed at least four years of veterinary school. The same goes for supplements; just because something’s labeled “natural” doesn’t mean that it’s not naturally toxic to your dog, or that it’s not contraindicated with another supplement or medication she’s taking.
29. HOW WILL NEUTERING OR SPAYING AFFECT MY DOG?
Perhaps a more relevant question is how will it affect you? There’s no evidence that “fixing” causes adverse medical reactions; quite the opposite, in fact. The notion that altering interferes with the development of certain breeds’ distinctive look has been debunked, too. Instead, it’s been shown that the accompanying growth slowdown allows joints and bones to develop correctly. Dogs that have been neutered or spayed tend to grow larger than their unfixed littermates, too. Moreover, dogs don’t have ego issues connected with their sex organs, nor do they sentimentalize motherhood. So if you’re not a breeder, any reservations about having your dog’s uterus or testicles removed are pure projection. (Admit it, the anatomical precision of that description made you more uncomfortable than the terms spaying or neutering. Your dog, on the other hand, would react equally—i.e., not at all—to either expression.)
A prime reason to spay or neuter your dog is to be a good global citizen. One busy bitch can produce as many as 67,000 descendants, exponentially, in six years, and some six to eight million dogs and cats are euthanized annually in the United States alone. Dogs don’t have impulse control and they don’t practice safe sex, so it’s up to you to ensure that they don’t contribute to the misery of their species.
But spaying and neutering offer less altruistic benefits. A female who’s been spayed won’t go into heat, as her twice-yearly reproductive cycles are called—which means less mess for you, less discomfort for her (although as far as I know, no studies have been done about doggie menstrual cramps and PMS), and less upheaval for everyone because hordes of panting male suitors won’t be coming to call. Spayed females also run a lower risk of mammary gland (breast) cancer—not to mention zero risk of uterine and ovarian cancer.
For males, early neutering can minimize aggression; roaming (guy pups are literally heat-seeking missiles, always on the prowl for those busy bitches); and, in some cases, marking (thus allowing you to take a walk without stopping every two seconds for pee dispersal). Neutering may also keep males from humping inappropriate love objects like the legs of your houseguests. Without the distraction of raging hormones, they’re also better able to concentrate on training. Naturally, neutering also eliminates the possibility of testicular cancer.
Those who have a problem with unmanning—undogging?—their pooches can pretend it didn’t happen by investing in Neuticles (www.neuticles.com).21 Allowing your dog “to retain his natural look” and “self-esteem,” these silicon nut substitutes are available in three sizes and three degrees of firmness. Prices range from $109 per pair for the original rigid ones for small dogs to $1,799 for a customized set of the more pliant ones. I shudder to think how many dog balls needed to be handled to perfect this invention.
The jury is still out on the best age for spaying and neutering. Conventional wisdom once had it that females should be allowed to go through one heat cycle before surgery, but that’s no longer advised (presumably to the dismay of the manufacturers of Bitch Britches, also called season panties). The suggested spaying age is now five to six months, preceding the first heat. Similarly, where four to six months used to be the recommended age for neutering, some vets now say that males as young as eight weeks can safely undergo the operation (though you’d have to wait a while to insert adult-size Neuticles). Although vet consensus is that it’s best to neuter early, before the behaviors the procedure are meant to prevent become ingrained, most agree that neutering can be useful in diminishing aggression later in life, too. Apparently, testosterone poisoning isn’t limited to the very young.
30. WHAT’S THE LATEST WORD ON VACCINATIONS?
Individualize. There’s no question that vaccinations are essential to your dog’s health, but views on the efficacy, frequency, risk, and even type of shots required have shifted in recent years. Annual boosters are no longer advised for most vaccines, for example; three-year updates are now considered sufficient. Similarly, because research has shown that not all vaccines remain effective for the same length of time, the practice of bundling—putting several vaccines together in a single shot—is becoming less common.22 In short, a no-shot-fits-all philosophy is emerging. A responsible vet should take the age, breed, habits, and immune system of your dog—as well as the region in which you live—into account when determining which inoculations to give.
045
Vaccines fall into two basic categories: the core group, which protect against diseases that are particularly dangerous, are easily transmitted, and/or are dangerous to humans, including distemper, adenovirus, parvovirus, and rabies; and the noncore group, recommended for dogs at specific risk. Desert-dwelling dogs don’t have to worry about Lyme disease, for example, as those who live in humid, tick-rich areas do; and pups who don’t go to doggie daycare or engage in group overnight sleepaways need not be inoculated against kennel cough. Even with core group medications, however, vaccinations should be considered on an individual basis. The risks of vaccinating very old dogs, dogs with compromised immune systems, and certain toy breeds, say, may outweigh the benefits.
Lately, there’s been a good deal of interest in titer tests, which determine the continuing effectiveness of a vaccine by measuring the level of antibodies present in the blood. At this point, however, many of these tests aren’t considered accurate enough to justify their expense. Results are not consistent for all diseases—many researchers consider only those for distemper and parvo reliable—or even for all breeds.
The bottom line: A series of core group shots are recommended for puppies as soon as they’ve lost their mothers’ immunity, at around four weeks; at the latest, these initial shots should be given at six months. After two years of age, tread—or shoot—lightly. Don’t second guess your vet, but stay informed.
31. AT WHAT AGE SHOULD I GET MY DOG’S EARS CROPPED AND TAIL DOCKED?
At no age, if most veterinarians have their say. Cropping and docking have been outlawed in many countries, and the American Veterinary Medical Association’s policy statement dubs these surgeries “not medically indicated, nor of benefit to the patient,” noting that they “cause pain and distress.”
Historically, tail docking, or surgical shortening, helped prevent working dogs from getting injured. For example, overlong tails of hunting dogs running through brush to retrieve prey might get burrs caught in them, and sheepdogs might be mistaken for wolves threatening the herds and get shot in error. Cutting and bandaging a dog’s ears to make them stand upright, on the other hand, was always purely aesthetic, done to make guard dogs like Boxers and Dobermans look fierce and alert. Now most of these cosmetic procedures are performed—usually without anesthesia in early puppyhood—to make dogs conform to the American Kennel Club’s breed registry standards.
In addition to being cruel and—except in working dogs—useless, tail docking also interferes with communication. How can you know what your dog is trying to tell you if he doesn’t have a tail? And I think cropped ears make a pup appear not so much fierce as astonished—the same look you get from a too-tight facelift.
32. WHAT’S THE BEST WAY TO KEEP MY DOG HEALTHY?
Dogs need to do the same things that we need to do to stay in shape: eat well and get plenty of exercise. Luckily, it’s an easier regimen to enforce than to stick to: your dog can’t binge on junk food unless you provide it (or he lucks into a McDonald’s dumpster), and you’ll never hear him complain, “Sorry, I’m just not up for walking today.”23
When it comes to disease, human-canine principles converge, too, with prevention, early detection, and early correction being key.
PREVENTION
To keep your dog from getting seriously ill you need to …
046Vaccinate (see question 30)
047De-bug
048Brush teeth
Parasites such as heartworm, fleas, ticks, and mosquitoes are more than just nuisances to dogs; they can be deadly. Pet store shelves are filled with products to eliminate them: pills, topical creams, single doses, combinations … But don’t use anything without consulting your vet.24 If your dog already has heartworm, for example, and you give him preventative medication for it, the nuked worms can clog his cardiovascular system (how’s that for a scare tactic?). And cat medications—even if they look the same as dog remedies and are on sale—can make your dog sick. What part of “different species” don’t you understand?
Yes, you need to brush your dog’s teeth. I’ll explain why in Chapter 4.
EARLY DETECTION
Early detection is important in maintaining your dog’s health.
BE HANDS ON—LITERALLY
One of the advantages of brushing your dog’s coat regularly is that you can feel for any new growths or scabs. While you’ve got him in that pleasure zone of grooming, peer into and sniff at his ears (there’s more on all this in Chapter 5).
Be observant
A change in habits—especially drinking, eating, and elimination—can presage illness.
See your vet annually
Take your dog for a yearly vet visit (twice a year for a senior pet), even if your dog seems fine.
Early correction
Don’t procrastinate. If you don’t take care of a health problem as soon as you discover it, it can get out of hand—and thus become even more expensive to deal with than it was initially.
33. HOW DO I KNOW WHAT’S NORMAL VERSUS WHAT I NEED TO WORRY ABOUT?
Dogs do a lot of stuff that seems very strange to us and perplexes even people with advanced degrees in animalology. Because it’s comforting to know what behavior belongs in the realm of peculiar but not unique, here are some of the most common examples of the peculiar.
EATING
Some dogs eat dirt and/or grass. Others down nonorganic foreign objects, like TV remotes and pantyhose. And still others eat feces—their own, other dogs’, other species’. (There’s even a term for this taste for waste—coprophagia.)
No one is entirely sure why dogs have such eclectic palates. The consumption of indigestible items is the biggest problem, because you’ll have to pay for surgery if those pantyhose don’t pass through without incident. But it’s the poop-eating that seems to drive people craziest, even though it’s not generally harmful. My dog’s adorable, they protest. How could he be so disgusting? Proposed cures include putting meat tenderizer in your dog’s food—apparently it makes the poop less yummy—or sprinkling Bitter Apple on the turds. The most logical solution: clean up after your dog immediately.25
BREATHING/VOCALIZATIONS
Along with barking and howling, dogs pant. It’s their method of air-conditioning: they cool themselves off by increasing evaporation in the respiratory tract. Some dogs don’t pant much, except when it’s really warm or after strenuous exercise. Others pant at the drop of a hat, whenever they’re excited or nervous. The length of panting varies, too. The particular functioning of your dog’s self-cooling unit will soon become evident to you.
Dogs also produce many un-doglike vocalizations. When I first heard Frankie sigh, for example, I was terrified that he was the reincarnation of my mother, queen of the emotionally fraught exhalation. I’ve come to see that, although Frankie inspires guilt in his own special way, his sighs signal impatience or satisfaction rather than disappointment with me. At least that’s what I’ve chosen to convince myself they mean.
ELIMINATING
Watch for differences when your dog goes to the bathroom.
Liquid
Marking is the stop-and-start, back-leg-raised urinating that unneutered males do to say “I was here” (also known as pee-mail) or “I see your pee and I pee on it!” (a form of pooch poker called four-legged stud). But cross-peeing is also quite common: some laid-back males, even those neutered late, squat and empty their bladders completely, while some alpha females raise their legs and pee in short bursts. So don’t worry if your pup likes to urinate outside gender stereotypes.
Solid
I’ve already discussed feces eating. Dogs also do something called “scooting” or “scooching”: dragging their behinds across the grass, the floor, or—particularly popular—your white rug. This might indicate something as simple as that your dog’s butt itches or that she wants to dislodge some dingleberries; it might, on the other hand, indicate that her anal “glands”—the small, scent-bearing sacs that inspire dogs to sniff each other’s butts—need to be drained.
Some people perform the fairly simple procedure of squeezing (expressing) these sacs at home, after being instructed on how to do so by a vet. Others—and I include myself in this category—are completely grossed out by the idea. What smells good to a dog doesn’t always synch with human olfactory preferences, especially in concentrated form. I therefore pay a groomer to do it.
MOVING
Digging comes naturally to many dogs, particularly terriers and other working breeds taught to keep their hunters’ prey protected underground. These Earth relocation projects don’t have to have an object; some dogs simply like digging for its own sake. Some digging, however, is related to burying food, toys, or anything else your dog wants to save for later. I wouldn’t worry about hoarding unless your dog takes his kibble, bit by bit, to the backyard.
Perhaps more disconcerting than digging is the circling and scratching that many dogs do before they lie down. Some hypothesize that this might be a vestige from the days when wolves needed to clear snakes or other pests from the den. Sometimes Frankie roots around vigorously before he goes to sleep; sometimes he doesn’t bother. I’ve never tried to determine whether there’s a correlation between the length of his exploratory gestures and the cleanliness of my sheets.
And yes, there are doggie shrinks—called behaviorists. I’ll talk more about them in Chapter 6.
34. WHAT SHOULD I DO IN CASE OF EMERGENCY?
Be prepared. And try to stay calm.
Keep the number and address of your nearest emergency (24-hour) veterinary facility and the ASPCA’s poison control hotline (1-888-426-4435) on your refrigerator and in your wallet. Keep a credit card number handy, too; there’s a $60 fee for the poison hotline, and you’ll be expected to pay a deposit for emergency care. Also, have a couple of people lined up who’ll be able to help you get to the vet while you tend to your dog if necessary.
Put together or buy a first-aid kit (they’re available at mega pet stores or large discount retailers). It should include the following:
049Muzzle, or the materials to improvise one (including a belt or necktie)
050Sterile gauze pads and gauze bandage rolls
051First-aid adhesive tape
052Nonstick bandages
053Tweezers
054Scissors
055Resealable plastic bags
056Three percent hydrogen peroxide
057Antibacterial ointment
058Eyedropper
059Milk of Magnesia or activated charcoal
060Digital or rectal thermometer
061Splint materials (tongue depressor or 12-inch wooden ruler)
Have protective leather gloves, clean towels, and a blanket on hand, too.
Before trying to examine your dog so you can describe her symptoms to the emergency vet, muzzle her.26 When in pain, your ordinarily laid-back pup might lash out with her teeth. You won’t be much help to her if you require medical assistance yourself.
First-aid classes and videos, especially those demonstrating CPR, are useful, but—except for keeping your dog still if you fear bone breaks or internal injury or trying to stop profuse bleeding by applying pressure—you should generally avoid doing anything without the advice of the professional whose number you’ll have on hand.
One exception: As I’ve mentioned, dogs eat weird stuff all the time, so it’s useful to know that you can perform a doggie Heimlich procedure. Just be sure your dog is actually choking, as opposed to having breathing problems: signs include pawing at the face and throat and attempting to cough, as well as blue lips.
When you’re certain your dog’s throat is obstructed …
062Try to calm her; fright might make her try to bite you when you open her mouth.
063Look down her throat to try to find the blockage. Make sure you actually see and identify something rather than just sticking your hand down and tugging at whatever seems not to belong. Dogs have small bones in their necks that can easily be mistaken for a stick or chicken bone.
064Use tweezers (or pliers) to try to remove the object, carefully ; don’t accidentally move the object farther down the throat.
065If you can’t see or easily get at anything, lift your dog’s rear legs or, if she’s small enough, hold her upside down by the hips. Gravity is your friend.
066Still nada? With your dog standing, put your hands below her rib cage and pull up into her abdomen quickly five times. If nothing comes out, try looking down her throat again; you may be able to see something now.
I don’t recommend doing this in a moving car—especially not one you’re driving—but you’ll want to get to a vet as soon as possible, even if you manage to get your dog to cough up the goods (or, I should say, the bads).
35. ENOUGH ABOUT MY DOG’S HEALTH. CAN MY DOG MAKE ME SICK?
For the most part, no—at least not in the usual sense of transmitting diseases.27 Although pups and people suffer from some similar ailments, germs and viruses tend to be species specific. True, bugs and parasites that are dangerous to humans can pass unmolested through canine intestines—but that’s only a problem if you pick up dog poop with your bare hands or don’t wash up after playing with your dog in the dirt where he’s pooped in the past. Somewhat less disgusting but no less lacking in common sense would be removing a disease-bearing tick from your dog without safely disposing of it, thus allowing the little bloodsucker to get under your skin.
And, yes, you can get rabies if your rabid dog bites you, but if you own a vicious dog that hasn’t been vaccinated, I somehow doubt you’re reading this book.
Dog owners are, however, subject to a group of less widely reported and thus more insidious Canine-Related Injuries (CRIs). According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), an average of 76,500 people per year trip over their dogs. Most incidents occur during walks, when 31.3 percent reported that they “fell or tripped over the dog” and another 21.2 percent admitted they were “pushed or pulled by the dog.” These statistics, based on data from emergency room visits, likely represent only a fraction of actual CRIs because, according to the CDC, “many people don’t seek treatment after injuring themselves in accidents involving their pets.”
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Or they seek treatment outside of emergency rooms. A physical therapist friend told me that she has seen multiple cases of dislocated shoulders caused by sudden and vigorous tugging on the leash. A less typical CRI, but one with which I have personal experience, is tendonitis of the wrist that can result from letting a small dog rest his head on your hand while you’re typing.
Most CRIs can be prevented by training—both of you and your dog. Work on ways to get your dog to stop tugging at the leash and to remind yourself to watch for underfoot pups.
More difficult is to train yourself to use common sense—say, when it comes to refusing your pup his chosen headrest.
But the health benefits that dogs confer far outweigh any potential problems. Studies have shown that dogs—and, okay, other warm-blooded pets that shall remain nameless—lower blood pressure and cholesterol; stave off depression; and hasten recovery from major surgery. And that’s just for starters. So go kiss your dog, and let her kiss you back. Just don’t lick your own face directly afterwards.